CUE: I’m a girl, I’m nice. You’re a boy, a puppy dog tail! Ha, ha, ha!
SOLOIST:
I HAD A SORDID DREAM LAST NIGHT,
A DREAM I DREAMED IN BLACK AND WHITE,
ONLY A DREAM YET STILL
IT SEEMED SO REAL!
AN ATMOSPHERE PHYSCOTIC
AND A SHADE HOMOEROTIC
WHICH CAME AS A BIG SURPRISE,
I DON’T LIKE GUYS!
UNEMPLOYED YOUNG THESPIANS
THEY DRUG UP OFF THE STREET,
AND APPARENTLY SOME LESBIANS
SOMEBODY CHANCED TO MEET…
THEY ALL POPPED UP FROM JUST THIN AIR
OH YEAH, AND SATAN ALSO THERE,
OR AT LEAST I SUPPOSE,
BUT HELL, WHO KNOWS…?!
CHORUS:
ALL OUT OF JOINT AT HER,
THEY’D COME TO POINT AT HER,
THEY’D COME TO CALL HER NAMES,
SUCH HORRIBLY APPALLING NAMES
IN GLENDA’S BAD DREAM!
THEY’D COME TO CHASE AT HER,
SPIT IN THE FACE OF HER,
THEY’D COME TO CORNER HER
AND SAVAGELY HEAP SCORN ON HER
IN GLENDA’S BAD DREAM!
BUT WHEN THEY CAUGHT HER THERE
SHE WAS A LADY FAIR
RADIANT AS ANY YOU’D MEET,
HE’D PLAYED A SWITCH ON THEM,
WHAT’S WHAT OR WHICH ON THEM,
GLENDA’S TORMENTORS ALL BEAT A RETREAT!
FOR SHE WAS GLAMOUROUS
AND SHE WAS GLORIOUS
AND ALL VICTORIOUS
FOR DRAG WAS MERITORIOUS
IN GLENDA’S BAD DREAM!
THEN ALL AT ONCE A NOISE
UPSET HER EQUIPOISE
IT CAME FROM OFFSTAGE SOMEWHERE…
IT WAS HER FUTURE BRIDE
NOW SOMEWHAT ZOMBIFIED
LOOKING FOR GLEN, OH BUT GLEN WASN’T THERE…!
